Leilani has been talking up a storm in these past few days. Most words are not yet recognisable, but she understands a lot. She can purr like a cat, pant like a dog, makes car (and tricycle) sounds, if I ask about the sheep she goes Baeaeae, and the newest addition is -Maehaehae – the goat. Mama and Dada have been used more and more correctly, and puffs, her favorite food, puffed kamut and rice, she has used understandably for at least 10 days. She often repeats words that I or Andy say – Duckie (the name of her little duck puppet), beach, ball, and of course Milch (milk in German). Unfortunatelly the sounds are not clear – she can’t do u or s at all, and the o sounds more like a – ch, k and g are indistinguable, as are p and b, d and t (well, I am not a prime example of doing these right either…) and if 2 consonants follow each other… Oh, and she babbles, practices sounds (and sign language) without meaning anything in particular… and we don’t know if it is English or German… Anyway…. Today in the evening she sat next to me, going “mig mich mik…” I more or less ignored her, sitting at the computer, thinking she was talking to her toys. Until she pulled herself up on my chair, looked at me and said: “Mama! Milch” – she really wanted milk too! I’d vote that as an official first sentence!
Month: September 2006
I was emptying the dishwasher, and Leilani took off, crawling as fast as she could. After putting away the dishes I had in my hands I followed her to the livingroom, and with a sense of panic I realized she was not there. I ran into the play room, and found her happily petting Jojo, who obviously enjoyed it!!! I watched them, and except for a few hair and tailpulls Leilani seemed gentle enough. Looking back I realize both cats have been a lot more trusting for quite a while now.
At a recent party Leilani and Ian were playing, passing back and forth a little white ball – the first interactive game I ever saw between them. They had played with parents, toddlers, kids before, but not with each other. Karla and I had to help a little occasionally, but they had initiated it, and kept it going too.
A little girl, about 4 years walked up, and took the ball from Leilani. Since little girls are often fascinated with babies I thought she wanted to play with them. I was a little dissapointed that the game had ended, but anticipating a new one to begin. Unfortunately I did not like what I saw. The girl was holding out the ball to the babys, grinning as they reached for it, and then she teasingly pulled it away, repeatedly. Leilani was frustrated. Not wanting to scold someone elses kid, we distracted Leilani with Andy’s camera (waterproof and fairly throwsafe). Leilani grabbed it happily and crawled off – not to far though, because the girl ripped the camera out of her hands and proclaimed “This is not a toy. You can’t have that.” Then she tried to take off with the camera. We were pretty angry at her by then. Andy told her she could not just come here and take all the toys from the babies and I took the camera from her, probably not much gentler than she had taken it from the baby and gave it back to Leilani. The “game” repeated. The girl pulled the camera from Leilani’s hands, and declared she could not have this, and I scolded her, that it was none of her business, and it was perfectly OK for Leilani to have the camera if her parents gave it to her.
At that point her mom – who was nursing the 6 months old brother gave me stink eye and called her daugther over. I was a little embarassed to have lost my cool, but kept watching the little girl. She came back, took Ian’s blanket and walked over to the 1 year old birthday girl, repeatedly throwing the blanket over her head. I was kind of happy that it was not my business anymore, and let the other adults deal with it. The longer I watched the little girl though, the more I felt sorry for her. Both her parents were at the party, her grandmother, and the grandmother’s husband, and neither of them paid any attention to the little girl – but everyone was playing with the little baby brother. For an hour and a half, the little girl wandered around, occasionally teasing a baby or a dog, and obviously very lonesome. Fortunately then the bigger boys and one of the dads started a football game and let her play with them, and she seemed so happy…
In any case, next time I’ll interfere earlier, and try to understand the motivation before I lecture a kid. I also added one more concern about having a second baby…
On a lighter note:
Leilani and Ian playing ball
Andy and I are both slightly socially handicapped. We are not full-blown geeks, but we do have some troubles getting conversations started, especially with strangers, and it takes quite a while until people are not strangers anymore. I am the more extroverted person, so people notice it less, maybe also because I often try really hard to be open and make contact. Older relatives have told me I was very shy as a kid.
Leilani is very different from both of us: when she sees kids – newborn to young teenager – she coos, flirts, smiles, and if nothing else helps sticks out her tounge… She really wants to meet children, and enjoys their company, even at the height of “stranger anxiety”. She only allows 4 or 5 familiar adults to hold her right now, but she will happily allow a 6 year old she has never seen her before to pick her up.
Yersterday in Hilo at the airport she was really bored. I didn’t want her to crawl too much on the filthy floor, so I held her by both hands and let her walk – she went straight for a family with 3 little boys, 5 to 8 years. I looked up and saw them all watching us and smiling 3 boys**, parents, grandparents… – I am still not used to all this friendlieness, Leilani has smiling karma, I think my entire life before she was born I saw less smiles than in the past 9 months… anyway. Leilani had started the smiling and they were all looking at us and smiling back. I mean…. I could not just turn her around and walk away… my heart pounded, from some misguided stagefreight…. I had to talk to an entire family of complete stangers… I did, awkwardly but I did. They were incredibly nice. Once I said hello and introduced Leilani, the boys took turns playing grimacing, singing, crawling on the floor in a make-believe catch game, Leilani was laughing loudly and enjoying all the games and attention so much.
I think a lot of the social behavior is learned, I really hope she keeps her friendly open ways. Often I admire some of our completely outgoing, spontaneous, smalltalking friends, it seems to open so many doors…
**On girls I would not have been surprised, but it turns out the mother runs a daycare in their home, and they constantly have babies there, and the boys just love them.
OK the good news: I snorkeled in the clear waters of Honaunau, pristine corals, colorful fish, turtles, incredibly beautiful… then a nice whole family swim – Leilani in a floatie far out into the at Ho’okena bay, I got to see an entire movie (Peaceful Warrior, by Dan Millman), we got to see the lava – from a great distance – and we did one (!!!) very nice hike, and another short walk on a petty nature trail. Totals about 7 hours. The trip did not make the list of my 3 worst vacations. Oh, and more good news. We took some nice pictures (but not of a smiling baby). Leilani did not poop her diaper on the trip. And we are back now…
The bad news: We drove almost 600 miles in 6 days, and stayed in 4 different places. Most of my time in the car, it seems was spend calming the upset baby (Leilani hates the carseat, and driving in general, she likes flying though) or being upset because Leilani was screaming, or fearing the cops because she was not in the carseat but on my lap. Leilani’s being upset did not just vanish getting out of the car… she missed her laying down and nursing naps, got overly tired and screamed at the top of her lungs at bedtime, stressed (loudly) about the hot Kona sun (94F – 34C) when Andy wanted to look at the Puako petroglyphs – we turned around. We wanted to see the lavaflow up close and I chickened out – 4 mile round trip over uneven lava, return in the darkness. Andy did not get to see the Pu’u Loa petroglyphs either, another unshaded lava hike. We actually went to a lot of beautiful places, but did not have enough time to really see them, hike them, explore them. The Volcanoes cabins (at Namakani Paio) were filthy, cramped and expensive.
The conclusion: I’ll plan the next trip, not California, which we will change the planning together, but the one after. We’ll stay 3-4 nights in one place, limit driving to about 1 hour on most days, do more hiking, swimming, snorchling, playing instead. Andy can take one of these 3-4 days off family and drive around and explore on his own.
Leilani, Andy and Mauna Kea at the saddle:
Snorkeling at “Two-Step” right near Honaunau place of refuge heiau:
Sunset at Ho’okena Beach:
Ho’okena swimming:
Black sand baby:
Lava entering the ocean:
Lava watchers:
Cabin at Volcano National Park (Namakani Paio campground):
Thumbs down:
